Your Relationship – Creating Chemistry

Chemistry is not something that is just going to happen in any relationship. Establishing good chemistry with someone requires time and effort, but you get out of the relationship what you put into it. Obviously there has to be a spark between two people in the first place for chemistry to grow, but it does not “just happen”. If there is that spark between you and the person you are dating, there is a lot you can do to really put the fire into your relationship. If you don’t you may soon be looking for information on how to To get an ex back quicker than you think

But to begin with you must recognize the chemistry in a relationship. It can be difficult for you to understand what chemistry is, if you have not felt it with someone. Just like love, it can be hard to appreciate until you have truly experienced it for yourself. What a lot of people believe chemistry to be, is that you are somehow meant to be together. That you enjoy being in one another’s company and want to be with each other as much as possible. And undoubtedly there must be a physical attraction between the two. But looks are only a tiny aspect in how chemistry is created in a relationship. The mental factor is much more important, and is based on on having shared values and beliefs, interests and even habits and pet peeves.

You and your significant other must first build a rapport. You cannot grow chemistry with your other half if you don’t first develop a good rapport with them. If you’ve only seen a person one or two times and think that you have a strong rapport, it is very unlikely. It is more likely to be lust for the person that you wrongly perceive to be a powerful connection. To create a rapport you have to really get to know the other person. What excites them, what interest them, what frightens them and what annoys them. If you can find a topic to talk about that you are both interested in, you will quickly develop the rapport you want, as you discover more about the other person and the similarities you have. But be sure sure that it is a topic that is pleasant or fun, not one that will cause friction or an argument. For instance you may discover that you both enjoy discussing politics, but are you really a good time talking about this with your date? Probably not.

Humour is key: Who doesn’t enjoy a good laugh? Laughing is good for you personally as it releases endorphins (the feel good chemical) in the body. But it is also key in bettering your relationship. When you laugh and joke with somebody, you feel completely at ease with that person, and you will also associate that person with fun and pleasure. Don’t worry however, you don’t have to be some kind of comedian. As long as you attempt to joke without it seeming forced, it is likely to work. Whatever you do, don’t be offensive, especially with someone you don’t know that well.

Be open about yourself. You can develop good chemistry with a person that doesn’t know the real you. There is nothing worse than coming back from a date and realising that you don’t know a thing about your date. If you are not open and honest with your date, they will know it and will think that you are either keeping something from them or don’t want to be open with them. If you allow that person in and show them what you are really like, the chances are they will appreciate the openness and think more of you. Don’t overdo it though. You want the other person to be able to talk about themselves as well

Make use of Adrenaline. You can trick the mind into mistaking adrenaline, with attraction for your date. If you experience a feeling of a thrill and excitement, the mind will mistake this for enjoying of being with the other person, rather than just enjoying the situation. So make use of this by planning dates that are likely to get the adrenaline going like a trip to the fair to go on the rollercoaster, or a scary movie

Getting Physical. Don’t overdo the use of touch. A lot of people don’t like being touched especially by someone they do not know very well. You can usually tell when a person is comfortable enough with you to have you touch their arm or their leg but don’t be too keen. Before this, talk about, the physical aspects of the opposite sex you find attractive.

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Date: Friday, 2. April 2010 15:21
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