As youíve probably noticed, thereís no shortage of relationship advice for women on how to get a boyfriend or deal with relationship problems. The lack seems to be somewhere in the middle: how do you avoid bad relationships in the first place?

Know who youíre looking for

When it comes to our love lives, most of us spend way too much time trying to be attractive to men in general and not nearly enough on deciding what type of man weíre really trying to attract. Iím not counting those fantasies about the tall, dark, and handsome wealthy investment banker who spends his weekends pirating on the high seas, either. I mean really thinking about the important character attributes of your ideal guy.

Watch out for major contradictions in your expectations, too. For instance, if you love the strong silent type, donít complain when your macho man has a hard time sharing his feelings.

Establish your boundaries

Boundaries, popularly known as ìdeal breakers,î are your signals to leave a relationship ASAP. Theyíre things like physical abuse, criminal background, and addictions.

Hereís the thing, though: you need to decide what your boundaries are before you get involved with anyone. Once youíre romantically and physically involvedóor even worse, financially entangledóitís way too easy to start making excuses for his behavior.

One good piece of relationship advice for women is to share your deal breakers with a friend. That way, when you call her up to complain, sheíll give you a nudge by saying something like, ìBut didnít you swear youíd break up with any guy who did that?î

Learn the warning signs

Tired of getting hurt by the same things over and over again? Most likely your man radar is broken. To fix it, learn the early warning signs that can
show you when your love interest is likely to be a cheater, physical abuser, alcoholic, or whatever else it is you want to avoid. This way you can filter out the noise and focus in on the good men. If you need pointers, relationship advice for women whoíve dealt with these kinds of guys can help you out.

Listen to your gut

How many times have you heard this one? Well, itís one of the most often repeated pieces of relationship advice for women because itís so true. In relationships, more than anywhere else, a gut feeling alone can tell you when things just arenít going to work out. Donít ignore your instincts.

Beware of instant attraction

Just about all of us have met at least one woman who swears she knew sheíd found her soul mate the moment she set eyes upon the man whoís now her husband. It does happen. Chalk that one up to instinct, too, I guess.

More often, though, instant attraction eventually leaves you dazed and miserable from a whirlwind affair that crashed in less than a month. If you feel yourself irresistibly attracted to a man you just met, take a step back and ask yourself why? If you canít see any major stop signs, go ahead and get to know the guy, but take it slower than you normally would. A strong initial attraction should make you more cautious, not less.

Before you read any more relationship advice for women, take some time to get clear on your own needs and desires. Decide what kind of man youíre looking for and set clear boundaries and youíll give yourself a much better chance of avoiding heartache in the future.

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