You wish to reconcile with your beloved, but he does not go on contact.

If are ready to continue to apologize, to try to explain something about feelings, to understand him – continue do it.

If such relation touches you — eventually, the love is not game in one collar if you feel that he “has jammed” on something – change intonations.

Add in a voice of severity and be silent, quiet, without emotions and a clap a door inform that you have got tired to start reconcile with him. Coldly take an interest — what he wants to achieve with such behavior. Does he wish to offend you? Well, you have already offended. Does he wish to be alone? Well, let will be so. If after a quantity of such questions he doesn’t react, leave the man in loneliness; seemingly, he has to think over the situation. If he does not have purpose to quarrel definitively, he for certain will take the first step.

If you understand, that your scandals have a certain recurrence and, as a rule, occur for the same reason, begin with yourself, understand what pushes you on the conflict. Further it will help you to keep control of a situation and not to break on scandals.

Step №1.

Distinguish own inadequacy. Ask yourself two control questions: do you during quarrel start to hate your partner? Is your anger persuasive?

Step №2.

Feel, what feelings you express in the course of quarrel? What emotions do you “broadcast”?

For example: the husband comes back home and you “splash out” on him all irritation and anger.

Step №3.

Recollect what you felt before have started to shout. For two hours, hour, half an hour, 15 minutes, 2 minutes prior to the beginning of quarrel. You should understand what occurred at your soul actually. Often — this list is headed by anxiety…. Continue your personal list.

For example: you worried, and the anxiety increased with each hour.

Step №4.

Analyze – of what the pre-conflict situation does remind you? What has pushed you to clarification of relations? Find out different hypotheses until you will feel other emotion (not anger and insult, and what was concealed at the bottom of your soul). If you “have got stuck” on this step, ask yourself a question “And how do I look from outside”.

For example: behind anger there is the fear to remain alone. Quite probably, you already have such experience before.

Step №5.

Define model of behavior typical for you in quarrel. Certainly, it is not the guarantor of that you will not behave like this again. For example: it is clear that scandals on a theme “Where you were” hardly will strengthen your family center, more likely, on the contrary will inevitably lead to divorce. As soon as you catch yourselves on thought that you are already ready to quarrel with husband, straighten out yourself and make something good.

It is very boring to live without quarrelling, and to save negative emotions it is not so useful. But try to speak to your partner tenderly and without shouting.

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